Every Number One Ever
A comedy podcast for pop music historians. Join us as we keep or bin every UK number one!
Podcast Description
A comedy podcast for pop music historians. Join us as we keep or bin every UK number one!
Episodes
Feb 17, 2025
Episode 119 - Bluey Rug Island
Feb 17, 2025
Feb 17, 2025
1hr 10 min
Its week like this week when one has to wonder if we're really doing god's work in helping us all towards the light, or if the devil really does make work for idle hands? Do you subscribe the irenaean or augustinian theodicies of podcasting? Have I properly lost the plot? Likely.
Feb 24, 2025
Episode 120 - The Aubergine Is A Fruit
Feb 24, 2025
Feb 24, 2025
1hr 18 sec
In which Craig wants to get ploughed, we discovery who has the most leathery appendage, and we embark on a short trip to Faliraki to find the source of the #ffj. Plus, the usual nonsense and some music gets discussed in there at some point too.
Mar 3, 2025
Episode 121 - In Faint Praise Style
Mar 3, 2025
Mar 3, 2025
56 min
In which our intrepid heroes encounter some novelty nonsense, a gay anthem (yes it is!), and get some massive heavy hitters in our picks of the week. There are still terrors lurking in the dark depths of pop music history. What else will get an airing this week?
Mar 10, 2025
Mar 10, 2025
1hr 19 min
In this episode, Matt will not rest and will not relent until Clock are given due consideration and appreciation. Once that's out of the way, we then get down to business with an encounter with the nation's favourite monkey, Craig continue's to strafe indiscriminately at the Popeye movie, and Liam threatens to lick people again. Plus some music in there too.
And sorry, its a BUMPER episode this week. We really need to be more concise in our ramblings.
Mar 17, 2025
Episode 123 - Not Just The Eyes
Mar 17, 2025
Mar 17, 2025
1hr 9 min
OOPSY! You weren't supposed to see (hear) that. We have now uploaded the proper, fit for public consumption version of the show.
Original blurb: Did you know Ray Liotta has died? No, neither did Liam. It is certainly a day of firsts too. Craig pronounces THAT word correctly. There's other stuff in there too, some music bits occasionally. You know, just keeping it varied.
Mar 24, 2025
Interval 1-25
Mar 24, 2025
Mar 24, 2025
1hr 29 min
We've managed to do this every single week for two and a half years without let up. Unfortunately real life has finally found us and we've need to take a short sabbatical. We'll resume our regular scheduled programming very soon.
However, in the interim we've been sifting through the detritus of the first 25 shows to bring you a "Best of" and "Rest of" from our formative weeks. See you guys soon, and hope you enjoy... the past?
Apr 7, 2025
A Update from ENOE Towers
Apr 7, 2025
Apr 7, 2025
1 min
Just a quick bit of info for you. We'll be back NEXT WEEK ladles and jellyspoons!
Apr 14, 2025
Episode 124 - Big Phone, Phone Big
Apr 14, 2025
Apr 14, 2025
1hr 3 min
After a minor hiatus, the security staff have turned off all the alarms, and we're allowed to leave the muster area (just opposite, by the bins at the local Costa) and return to the hallowed halls of ENOE Towers. This episode is filled with predictions, booms, drugs, capitalism, and discord (in all its forms).
Let normal service be resumed.
Apr 21, 2025
Episode 125 - The Chin Heard Around The World
Apr 21, 2025
Apr 21, 2025
1hr 10 min
We're keeping it topical this week. We discuss the latest astronaut (as The Simpsons taught us "the driver is essentially ballast"); a long-passed choreographer with overly coiffed hair; re-encounter 'the chin'; mention Ocean's 11l; and we hear possibly the worst piece of music the pod has EVER had.
Apr 28, 2025
Episode 126 - The Moan Train
Apr 28, 2025
Apr 28, 2025
1hr 3 sec
So. Before you listen I do need to warn you about the use of the word "sexy" here. The word occurs frequently and firmly throughout this week's episode. ENOE Towers take no responsibility for the bile and splenetic that such a word inspires in our listeners. Plus Craig enjoys a music video too much.

Welcome to Every Number One Ever!
A revisionist history of pop music and culture from 1952 to now.
Over the next three years, friends and DAA stalwarts Matthew Leonard, Craig Lowe, and Liam Maloney are pruning the UK pop charts from day dot to now. Randomly selected number ones fired at them and either banished to the bin for all eternity or raised to the hallowed pantheon of pop after discussion, argument and general nonsense.
The discarded songs will be expunged from history and in their stead shall be one randomly selected number two single. Will it be Penny Lane, God Only Knows, Jean Genie? Or the Dexys Midnight Runner's parody 'Come On England'? Only fate and a random spreadsheet function can know for sure!
So join us on our odyssey into pop as we try to correct some historical musical maladies and revitalise the once glittering UK pop chart.



